I recently completed a fourth and fifth step, and it showed me some stuff about me and my life. It always does. For me, there is nothing like a fourth and fifth step to make me “take off the rose colored glasses”. There I am. I am out. No hiding. Everything is there in black and white. There are no emotions attached to “the stock” to sway me one direction or another – just facts – just me.
This is not my first go at these two steps. They have come up quite a few times in my recovery. That said, I don’t know that I have ever connected so closely to the fifth step promises as this time around.
In case you don’t know, there is a paragraph of fifth step promises in Alcoholics Anonymous (4th edition) on page 75. I connected especially with two of them, which state, “Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator. We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience.”
I never felt more connected to something other than me then I do right now. It literally feels like I have tapped into a source of power not of myself.
It works if you work it, seriously.