Z

Camp Fear

This past weekend we were invited to celebrate a sober friend’s birthday at a “team building” camp. It’s one of those kind of places where you do trust falls and what not. Anyway, I have a pretty intense fear of heights, and the first obstacle up was the zip line. Damnit.

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Standing on the receiving end of this sucker, you cannot tell what lies between the drop off and the other side. In my mind, I was picture this ravine over a big stream. Immediately, my disease starts with the stories…

  • You’ll never do this, in fact you don’t even want to, so ha!
  • You’ll fall and break your neck.
  • You’ll die.
  • You’re smarter than needing to do something silly for cheap thrills.
  • You’ll get up there and freeze and then REALLY look like an ass because you’ll be the only one who doesn’t go.

Damnit. As the first group walked over, I shared out loud that it was looking doubtful that I would go. The first few people come on down. No issues. Then the birthday boy’s daughter expressed a fear of going, and I said let’s do it together (WE – anyone?). I geared up, gathered my rope, and started the trek to the other side with my scared buddy.

First off, I realized as soon as I headed over the sight line that there was in fact NOT a ravine between the two sides. The drop off was a short hill and a tiny trickle of a stream. SERIOUSLY?

We huffed up the hill zig-zagging back and forth. We reached the tree. K wasn’t sure she would go. She was really brave and climbed up, but ultimately she did climb back down and opt not to go. Fear conquers one.

Next, it was my turn. I climbed up the ladder. The leader for the day did a really great job talking me through walking around the tree, over a big open hole, to the edge. He hooked me up to the line and talked some sensible things to me. Ok, I made it. Now to choose, overcome my fear or give in?!

I did it! I told him let’s do it, let’s go (before I back out)! OFF I WENT!

Wow! That was it? All that fear and worry melted away and all of it for nothing. I zipped over my imaginary ravine and safely to the other side. Yesterday, it was a tie for fear and courage. 1-1

The theme of courage continues… and I’m staying open to it!

-Z

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